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This would have been bad enough even if I still believed in the church but deep down, I didn’t anymore. Even before I left I had questioned many things. There was just too much that was illogical, contradictory, clashed with well -established historic and scientific facts, or was frankly stupid. Yet, despite this, here I was spending the prime of my youth trying to get people to swallow this crap. After a long and particularly horrible day of having countless doors slammed in my face I simply lost it. That evening back at our apartment I just spilled it and told my companion how I actually felt, knowing the consequences could be dire. He was the best companion I’d had to this point which did make it easier to talk with him. To my enormous relief, not to mention amazement he told me he was in the same boat having mentally and emotionally ditched the church too. Now at least we could talk like normal nineteen year old guys in the privacy of our apartment at night. Sex of course became a topic since at our age; we were both in our sexual prime. The fact was that we both had only the most basic understanding of sexual matters. We had the most vague, elementary, understanding of how babies were made. What real female anatomy looked like or the mechanics of having sex and how to do it were taboo and never taught to us. Aside from “The Talk” that usually lasted about five minutes when you entered middle school, all that was ever said about sex was that it was evil and had to be avoided like the plague before marriage. Thus there could be no more mysterious and fascinating subject. One hot afternoon of being rejected at every door we had knocked on we rang the bell of a medium sized house. Fully expecting to be kicked off the property we waited for a response. The door swung open and there was a big, tall kind of burly, hairy guy, wearing nothing more than a pair of running shorts and a smile. He must have been in his mid-thirties. My companion and I were both a bit small framed, somewhat nerdy, smooth for guys our age, and stood staring nervously at the guy like we were encountering Goliath. “Hi guys! Come on in.” he said in a refreshingly jovial manner while opening the screen for us. Extremely relieved we followed him down a short hallway and into his living room. On entering it our jaws dropped! Had a UFO landed and disgorged a bevy of unicorns and fairies we couldn’t have been more astonished! On a large TV screen ten feet in front of us was a video was playing and it wasn’t the Tabernacle Choir either! The screen was filled with the image of indian a guy’s butt. Both his legs were drawn up as he was lying on his side. His dick and balls hung down and his hole was fully exposed with another guy’s finger sliding in and out of it! All we could do was stand there like a couple of bedazzled deer in the headlights we were so stunned. As though there was absolutely nothing unusual going on, our host graciously asked if we would like some ice water and offered us a seat on the couch. Ungluing our eyes from the screen and snapping back to reality we accepted. We really wanted to just keep watching the TV but also knew we couldn’t deliver our message with it on. “Whoa…hold on there! “Neither is being a bad girl. And by the way, he's not just some 'Mexican dude', as you call him. It all felt so beautiful, so delectably sinful that I couldn’t resist. My cheeks warmed as I stared at my secret lover. I could make a phone call right now and have several guys come over and fuck me . She then slid a finger in side her, get over here and lick me she ordered or I will call daddy. “I guess he got some of the action on his cell phone as well. “Terry thinks I should wear something better. My ears twitched. As I sat there gently stroking her knee which was about as far as I could reach from where I was sitting I heard the front door go Dave was home we both sat up to say hello. I said that I was a little concerned that we would be naked out in public in an area where indian there would be quite a few policemen. On one hand, it was an indescribable relief to finally have an answer, even if it was just theoretical.